Fit yourself for a pickle barrel
and learn how to crack nuts with your laptop
bro; those surfing skills won't do you much
good in the New Economy.
It's Road Warrior time, can you dig
the kerosene? Bottled water my ass.
You'll be clawing open cactus
and puking up the juice.
Cushy retiree, a Wal-Mart greeter?
Hah you wish, pal. That's a plum job
we won't like to see again
when the shit comes down.
Learn Mandarin, your nervous joke?
It won't save you, Gweilo--
Even the Chinese don't bother with it anymore;
they're too busy counting the minutes.